So, my life has kinda taken a time out.
Although I am still job hunting (and UNEMPLOYED: email me and I will send you a resume, portfolio, and pictures)...
I began volunteering for Manifest Equality.
And like the over achiever that I am, (take note future employers), I took a simple promise of four hours' a day and made it a full time job(stick-tuitive-ness).
No.
I am having tons of fun and meeting amazing people, so it is kinda AWEsome.
As soon as I can get some sleep and calm down I will return to regular posting.
Life sure is funny.
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Bye, bye love
Hello new apartment.
During these tragic times, there has been a lot of sacrificing...
I sold my books.
I sold my clothes.
I sold my cute, vintage furniture.
I, mistakenly, kept the cat... and Rob.
Point being, it has taught me that the true value of the material things we acquire is nil when life's gotta happen.
However, dear readers, I sold my Paco Jet as well...
and spent two days balling like a baby.
I realize many people decry the Paco Jet and its somewhat limited capacities, but goddammit, I loved my son. I spent tons of time adapting my recipes...
I had a lot of fun experimenting with various applications.
I made some awesome ice creams.
Now, granted, I still know how to make batch ice cream, but I am truly gonna miss the little bugger.
I sold my grandmother's car to buy him.
I hauled his ass across state lines.
Now, my dear boy is a security deposit for an apartment on Rossmore.
Chef Lee got to keep his knives. (So did I, I'm just joking around because he says I'm bitter. Which I am.)
I also had to part ways with my engagement ring... so...
All the single ladies, put your hands up!
If he liked it then he shouldda kept a ring on it....
During these tragic times, there has been a lot of sacrificing...
I sold my books.
I sold my clothes.
I sold my cute, vintage furniture.
I, mistakenly, kept the cat... and Rob.
Point being, it has taught me that the true value of the material things we acquire is nil when life's gotta happen.
However, dear readers, I sold my Paco Jet as well...
and spent two days balling like a baby.
I realize many people decry the Paco Jet and its somewhat limited capacities, but goddammit, I loved my son. I spent tons of time adapting my recipes...
I had a lot of fun experimenting with various applications.
I made some awesome ice creams.
Now, granted, I still know how to make batch ice cream, but I am truly gonna miss the little bugger.
I sold my grandmother's car to buy him.
I hauled his ass across state lines.
Now, my dear boy is a security deposit for an apartment on Rossmore.
Chef Lee got to keep his knives. (So did I, I'm just joking around because he says I'm bitter. Which I am.)
I also had to part ways with my engagement ring... so...
All the single ladies, put your hands up!
If he liked it then he shouldda kept a ring on it....
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
To balance out the kimchi post,
and to keep the reader in perspective on how solidly to take my Korean cooking advice, I present:
In all its glory, my recipe for White Trash Cosmos (the only thing vaguely "cosmo" about this is the vodka and lime juice):
1 and 1/2 oz. cheapest local vodka
1 tsp grated fresh ginger
1/4 fresh lime
4 ice cubes
Muddle with vigor
3 oz. Diet Dr. Pepper
-shake and serve
Be careful not to shake much due to the whole carbonation thing... Really, you could just mix and serve...
If you do not understand the DP, thang, you are not from Texas, and you may not be my friend...
In all its glory, my recipe for White Trash Cosmos (the only thing vaguely "cosmo" about this is the vodka and lime juice):
1 and 1/2 oz. cheapest local vodka
1 tsp grated fresh ginger
1/4 fresh lime
4 ice cubes
Muddle with vigor
3 oz. Diet Dr. Pepper
-shake and serve
Be careful not to shake much due to the whole carbonation thing... Really, you could just mix and serve...
If you do not understand the DP, thang, you are not from Texas, and you may not be my friend...
Kimchi 101 Completed
To return to the point of this blog, food, here is my kimchi recipe:
(bear in mind that this makes enough kimchi to last a struggling restaurant for a week, so scale it down however you want, I'm too lazy) Also keep in mind that I
never cook using true measurements (not even when I bake), so if you want accuracy hire me as your personal chef and make sure I get full health coverage and a signing bonus...
4 heads Nappa cabbage
4 Tblsp kosher salt
Clean the cabbage and submerge in cold water mixed with the salt overnight in the fridge.
NEXT DAY
1 cup peeled garlic tips removed
2 and 1/2 inch nub of peeled ginger
2 cups assorted chili peppers with ends removed, cut into 1/2 inch pieces (like to use a mixture of Serranos, Jalepenos, Red Finger Chili, and Fresnos, but whatever you have access to fresh will do. Plus you can pick and choose which ones to use based on your desired heat.)
1 cup green onions stalks and stems, cleaned and cut into 1/2 inch pieces
1 cup shallots cleaned and cut into 1/2 inch pieces
1 tblsp kosher salt
Do not get all stressy about the knife cuts on the veg, because the next step involves the greatest shortcut ever.
Puree all that shit together until it smells like really yummy pizza. Unlike most kimchi recipes, I discovered that pureeing the vegetables not only saves time, it adds flavor by reducing the amount of liquid (water) needed to create the kimchi paste.
1 cup dried anchovies
1 cup salted shrimp
2 cups Korean style red pepper flakes
Add to your veg puree and mush around with your hand. Enjoy the feeling of pulverising their little bodies between your finger tips. If the veg puree did not yield enough liquid to make a paste when the pepper flakes are added, add water a bit at a time until it feels like chunky tomato sauce (Ragu not Prego).
Drain the cabbage leaves, but do not rinse them.
Get a big ass, sterile (very important) container with a tight ass lid.
Put a handful of the kimchi paste in the bottom of said container and top with about 10 or so Nappa leaves. Then swoosh it all around to fully cover the leaves (it should resemble bloodied arctic seals).
Then keep repeating with remaining leaves/paste, being careful to reach the bottom leaves and get the whole mess coated.
Make mud pies...
Clean your kitchen (especially the ceiling!), put the cover on the container, and walk away from it.
For 1-2 days depending on the weather.
Apologize profusely to family members and neighbors.
Tell the nice police officer you are not hiding bodies.
Yell at your spouse that, "If you don't shut up, I'm making Durian pies next week!"
Refrigerate once it takes on a bit of a translucent appearance and smells, you know, fermenty.
Enjoy having kimchi in your house and nose until it seems gross to do so (personal judgement is important here, I eat both fresh and ultra-aged stinky kimchi that most Koreans would say is "bad").
Yup, that's about it.
(bear in mind that this makes enough kimchi to last a struggling restaurant for a week, so scale it down however you want, I'm too lazy) Also keep in mind that I
never cook using true measurements (not even when I bake), so if you want accuracy hire me as your personal chef and make sure I get full health coverage and a signing bonus...
4 heads Nappa cabbage
4 Tblsp kosher salt
Clean the cabbage and submerge in cold water mixed with the salt overnight in the fridge.
NEXT DAY
1 cup peeled garlic tips removed
2 and 1/2 inch nub of peeled ginger
2 cups assorted chili peppers with ends removed, cut into 1/2 inch pieces (like to use a mixture of Serranos, Jalepenos, Red Finger Chili, and Fresnos, but whatever you have access to fresh will do. Plus you can pick and choose which ones to use based on your desired heat.)
1 cup green onions stalks and stems, cleaned and cut into 1/2 inch pieces
1 cup shallots cleaned and cut into 1/2 inch pieces
1 tblsp kosher salt
Do not get all stressy about the knife cuts on the veg, because the next step involves the greatest shortcut ever.
Puree all that shit together until it smells like really yummy pizza. Unlike most kimchi recipes, I discovered that pureeing the vegetables not only saves time, it adds flavor by reducing the amount of liquid (water) needed to create the kimchi paste.
1 cup dried anchovies
1 cup salted shrimp
2 cups Korean style red pepper flakes
Add to your veg puree and mush around with your hand. Enjoy the feeling of pulverising their little bodies between your finger tips. If the veg puree did not yield enough liquid to make a paste when the pepper flakes are added, add water a bit at a time until it feels like chunky tomato sauce (Ragu not Prego).
Drain the cabbage leaves, but do not rinse them.
Get a big ass, sterile (very important) container with a tight ass lid.
Put a handful of the kimchi paste in the bottom of said container and top with about 10 or so Nappa leaves. Then swoosh it all around to fully cover the leaves (it should resemble bloodied arctic seals).
Then keep repeating with remaining leaves/paste, being careful to reach the bottom leaves and get the whole mess coated.
Make mud pies...
Clean your kitchen (especially the ceiling!), put the cover on the container, and walk away from it.
For 1-2 days depending on the weather.
Apologize profusely to family members and neighbors.
Tell the nice police officer you are not hiding bodies.
Yell at your spouse that, "If you don't shut up, I'm making Durian pies next week!"
Refrigerate once it takes on a bit of a translucent appearance and smells, you know, fermenty.
Enjoy having kimchi in your house and nose until it seems gross to do so (personal judgement is important here, I eat both fresh and ultra-aged stinky kimchi that most Koreans would say is "bad").
Yup, that's about it.
Not a Kimchi Post
I know, I know, I'll finish up the actual food writing momentarily, but this post pertains to juicy, juicy gossip. My other love.
So I just made a promise that I cannot, nay will not keep...
Rob got a gig.
The irony is too terrific for me not share and wink at... He is now in a very limited capacity back at Square One!!!!!
Get it?
Do you get the joke?
Rob literally went back to Square One and gainful employment, and I started a blog about Square One!
Fuck, I might as well use this as my cat's (Maynard Chauncy Ramsey's) Facebook page...
However, due to my slightly off-color comments on scientology, I promised Rob I would not allow my ranting and his professional (read googlable) lives to be connected.
So, I must now make my case to the lords that be:
Dear scientologists;
Please do not find my online blatherings offensive. I have nothing negative (or positive, for that matter) to say about you. I am a very slight person (not in girth), who just happens to enjoy a good joke. And you, quite honestly, make for a good joke. I was raised by a bit artist (theton technologist), and sometimes I cannot help myself. I have had extensive contact with several of your species and have found them all to be, much like any other grouping of individuals except for those cats in Avatar, to be largely lovely with some degenerates thrown in. I only write about you on my silly/bitchy blog for one reason: it gets me google hits. You have a Cracker Jack team of peons who pay for the right to monitor your online status. While I owned SQ1 this terrified me, but now I see the secret in the suitcase... this shit is excellent PR. So get angry and all scary or whatever, just do it real public like so I can get a job, or a name, or a free audit.
As always, Thank You for Your Time,
-H.-
YES!
PS- Tom Cruise makes scientology look really good and really bad at the same time.
PPS- He's a nutjob.
So, yeah, that's quite enough of the midnight blogging. I will get back on track tomorrow with the recipe posting. Or, you could just offer me a whole bunch of money to be your personal chef and I'll give you the recipes.
Either way.
So I just made a promise that I cannot, nay will not keep...
Rob got a gig.
The irony is too terrific for me not share and wink at... He is now in a very limited capacity back at Square One!!!!!
Get it?
Do you get the joke?
Rob literally went back to Square One and gainful employment, and I started a blog about Square One!
Fuck, I might as well use this as my cat's (Maynard Chauncy Ramsey's) Facebook page...
However, due to my slightly off-color comments on scientology, I promised Rob I would not allow my ranting and his professional (read googlable) lives to be connected.
So, I must now make my case to the lords that be:
Dear scientologists;
Please do not find my online blatherings offensive. I have nothing negative (or positive, for that matter) to say about you. I am a very slight person (not in girth), who just happens to enjoy a good joke. And you, quite honestly, make for a good joke. I was raised by a bit artist (theton technologist), and sometimes I cannot help myself. I have had extensive contact with several of your species and have found them all to be, much like any other grouping of individuals except for those cats in Avatar, to be largely lovely with some degenerates thrown in. I only write about you on my silly/bitchy blog for one reason: it gets me google hits. You have a Cracker Jack team of peons who pay for the right to monitor your online status. While I owned SQ1 this terrified me, but now I see the secret in the suitcase... this shit is excellent PR. So get angry and all scary or whatever, just do it real public like so I can get a job, or a name, or a free audit.
As always, Thank You for Your Time,
-H.-
YES!
PS- Tom Cruise makes scientology look really good and really bad at the same time.
PPS- He's a nutjob.
So, yeah, that's quite enough of the midnight blogging. I will get back on track tomorrow with the recipe posting. Or, you could just offer me a whole bunch of money to be your personal chef and I'll give you the recipes.
Either way.
Monday, February 15, 2010
An Apology.
Geez, one week into my new blog and I have to apologize... I know that in the "Kimchi 101" post I promised to continue on in my kimchi making advice the next day, but, you know, then LA kinda happened. In between playing fetch with my cat (yes, he actually plays fetch), I received a smartphone from my wonderfully giving (and forgiving) father. I know I spend most of my time railing against technology (technology and scientology do sound alike), but I'll be damned if I didn't turn into a Miley Cyrus/Tila Tequila half-breed overnight. I spent my entire weekend walking around this fair city and handily documenting my excursions and picture sharing with the few people who grace my contact list. I also ate oysters for breakfast at the Hollywood Farmers' Market on valentine's day and got my anju on at Toe Bang (yes, real name) with Mr. Lee. I will post a pictorial documentation of my day as soon as he-who-is-more-technologically-adept-but-also-sleeps-late manages to get up and show me how the computer thingy and my phone thingy connect.
And I will eventually finish the kimchi post.
Sorry, this blog is as loosely structured as my life...
And, yes, I know how silly it is for a homeless, jobless person to be staying in a swank ass apartment on Sunset Boulevard and getting a Blackberry from Daddy.
I would like to publicly thank my friends and family for their support through all of this shite.
Everyone has reached out to us, and I promise we'll make good.
I may seem pithy most of the time, but it really is just a sad self-defense mechanism.
Well, and I obviously think I am pretty terrific or I wouldn't be blogging would I?
You should know, spellcheck just tried to make me capitalize scientology and smartphone...
Not gonna. do it
And I will eventually finish the kimchi post.
Sorry, this blog is as loosely structured as my life...
And, yes, I know how silly it is for a homeless, jobless person to be staying in a swank ass apartment on Sunset Boulevard and getting a Blackberry from Daddy.
I would like to publicly thank my friends and family for their support through all of this shite.
Everyone has reached out to us, and I promise we'll make good.
I may seem pithy most of the time, but it really is just a sad self-defense mechanism.
Well, and I obviously think I am pretty terrific or I wouldn't be blogging would I?
You should know, spellcheck just tried to make me capitalize scientology and smartphone...
Not gonna. do it
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Kimchi 101
Alright. I know. It is way beyond stupid to take kimchi making advice from someone of my pedigree. I was born and raised in Fort Worth, Texas, and despite the fact that I was adopted, am the poster child for uber whiteness. (My first birth certificate and adoption papers list my heritage as "English, Dutch, and German," does it get any more caucasian?) But, damn, I know my kimchi.
It all started during one of Rob and my's, "I hate that egomaniacal, rude, SOB," phases that we tend to cycle through every three years or so...
No one said being "co-chefs" was easy.
I digress.
I needed kimchi, in a bad way, but had no transportation to the valley to obtain my fav.
I began with quick kimchi (you actually cook the shit to fake fermentation), and eventually lead to what I can honestly say was perfect kimchi.
My perfect kimchi.
Kimchi has sooooo many variables and unique twists that it is as individual as its maker...
So yeah, I can say I make my perfect kimchi.
And no, no one has ever taught me how to make it. Rob's dear mother and I have cooked together on several occasions, but there is a rather crippling language barrier, and she does not have a taste for the spicy foods. (Her nickname for me, god bless her, is "The Kimchi Killer.")
So kimchi and I forged our own relationship.
To be continued with (vague) recipe tomorrow...
It all started during one of Rob and my's, "I hate that egomaniacal, rude, SOB," phases that we tend to cycle through every three years or so...
No one said being "co-chefs" was easy.
I digress.
I needed kimchi, in a bad way, but had no transportation to the valley to obtain my fav.
I began with quick kimchi (you actually cook the shit to fake fermentation), and eventually lead to what I can honestly say was perfect kimchi.
My perfect kimchi.
Kimchi has sooooo many variables and unique twists that it is as individual as its maker...
So yeah, I can say I make my perfect kimchi.
And no, no one has ever taught me how to make it. Rob's dear mother and I have cooked together on several occasions, but there is a rather crippling language barrier, and she does not have a taste for the spicy foods. (Her nickname for me, god bless her, is "The Kimchi Killer.")
So kimchi and I forged our own relationship.
To be continued with (vague) recipe tomorrow...
Um, hi there...
Sooooo, where to begin? I guess I should start by explaining the purpose of this blog...
If any of you were fans of Anju, An Asian Pub, I'm so sorry we had to close! We really hit our stride, menu wise, but could just not afford, professionally or personally to stay open. I thank all of you who supported us and worked with us! Sorry for the abrupt departure, it was not planned or intentional...
Rob and I (yes, the rumors are true, we have been an item for eight years and counting) were forced to choose between Fort Worth, TX and Los Angeles, CA. Family tends not to charge rent:). No offense to Texas, but let's just say LA won out. So we packed up what we couldn't sell, shoved the cat in a bag, and drove back to Socal. Before all you Portlanders get huffy about the whole LA thing, let me give you an analogy.
Hayden is to LA as Tom Hurly is to Portland (I mean that in the nicest way, Chef).
When we left LA I was very vocal about my hatred for the city.
I decried its public transportation, spoiled life outlook, and liberal taxes. I loved my time in Portland and really will miss it, but, upon returning to LA I now have a new appreciation for it. This city is many things, but embracing its duplicity and quirks makes you understand its beauty.
Anyway, I was speaking with a very dear friend over black cod and sake last night, and he suggested I start this blog as a way to keep in touch with all of Anju's fans. Rob and I are on the hunt for jobs right now, and as it turns out, once you've been self-employed for as long as we have, you become job kryptonite. It is still a rough scene out there in the job market. It seems like I'm going to have to just try and apply at Starbucks and the like to get some income and wait for the job recruiters to make me a match. (Quote of the century: when one recruiter, who is also working with Rob, found out mid-interview that we are a couple he said, "That's odd... I mean, he is so quiet and you are... not.") It is my hope that this blog will help to keep me engaged to my true calling (making food with heart-attack-inducing-caloric-content), until I can go pro again. It's my blog, so do not expect structured content. It might be reviews, could have some rants, perhaps a few recipes (White Trash Cosmos!)... Hopefully some folks will deem me witty enough to follow, but no one reads my personal blog, and if you are my friend on Facebook you know that I only ever need an audience of one: me.
It's hard to live for navel gazing...
Yeah, Blogging!!!
If any of you were fans of Anju, An Asian Pub, I'm so sorry we had to close! We really hit our stride, menu wise, but could just not afford, professionally or personally to stay open. I thank all of you who supported us and worked with us! Sorry for the abrupt departure, it was not planned or intentional...
Rob and I (yes, the rumors are true, we have been an item for eight years and counting) were forced to choose between Fort Worth, TX and Los Angeles, CA. Family tends not to charge rent:). No offense to Texas, but let's just say LA won out. So we packed up what we couldn't sell, shoved the cat in a bag, and drove back to Socal. Before all you Portlanders get huffy about the whole LA thing, let me give you an analogy.
Hayden is to LA as Tom Hurly is to Portland (I mean that in the nicest way, Chef).
When we left LA I was very vocal about my hatred for the city.
I decried its public transportation, spoiled life outlook, and liberal taxes. I loved my time in Portland and really will miss it, but, upon returning to LA I now have a new appreciation for it. This city is many things, but embracing its duplicity and quirks makes you understand its beauty.
Anyway, I was speaking with a very dear friend over black cod and sake last night, and he suggested I start this blog as a way to keep in touch with all of Anju's fans. Rob and I are on the hunt for jobs right now, and as it turns out, once you've been self-employed for as long as we have, you become job kryptonite. It is still a rough scene out there in the job market. It seems like I'm going to have to just try and apply at Starbucks and the like to get some income and wait for the job recruiters to make me a match. (Quote of the century: when one recruiter, who is also working with Rob, found out mid-interview that we are a couple he said, "That's odd... I mean, he is so quiet and you are... not.") It is my hope that this blog will help to keep me engaged to my true calling (making food with heart-attack-inducing-caloric-content), until I can go pro again. It's my blog, so do not expect structured content. It might be reviews, could have some rants, perhaps a few recipes (White Trash Cosmos!)... Hopefully some folks will deem me witty enough to follow, but no one reads my personal blog, and if you are my friend on Facebook you know that I only ever need an audience of one: me.
It's hard to live for navel gazing...
Yeah, Blogging!!!
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